Let’s get one thing straight; the term ‘high tea’ which is used today interchangeably with ‘afternoon tea’ was in fact a working class meal served on a high table at the end of the working day. It should never have been confused with afternoon tea, which was by contrast a very posh affair invented by the Duchess of Bedford who got peckish (what we simply call greedy) in between meals.
Frankly, we couldn’t give a fandango about all of that. Especially since here at TOAD we are an ignorant and simple-minded lot who associate the ‘high’ of high tea with high society and the height of the tiered tea plate. In any case, it made sense to put things into perspective when venturing on a tea sampling escapade about town.
Golden Moments 24-Carat Afternoon Tea
The Fairmont’s Chocolate Gallery has a more trendy (than posh) take on the whole affair. Unfortunately, when we first arrived, the service-staff made us feel like those pesky family-friends who show up unannounced at the most inappropriate times. Inexcusable really, considering we’d made our reservation two days in advance (and called them a zillion times to make sure they could accomodate certain dietary requirements).
When they eventually did get around to approaching our table rather tentatively, we were presented with a menu that boasted 86 kinds of tea, under the following categories: Black, Oolong, Chai, Blue, Puehr, Rooibos, Flowering, White, Green, Decaffeinated, Fruit & Herbal, and finally just Herbal. Spoiled for choice, we ordered one that sounded like an expensive vintage, the Lapsang Zhivago 1919, and also a Safari Masala Chai. Both arrived in large, glass tea-pots atop little candle-burners which kept the tea hot. The first was a delicious brew that carried strong notes of smoked stuff and BBQ wood. The second, true to its name, was a rich and warming infusion of aromatic spices. Fantastic stuff!
In our snooty opinion, Chocolate Gallery’s tea is top notch. So it’s a shame we can’t claim the same about their snacks. Now it must be said that the Fairmont cater for the gluten-sensitive, for which they instantly receive two points. One of these points they promptly lose to presentation. No afternoon tea is complete without a tiered plate piled with goodies. Our goodies however were served sporadically on separate plates, which made our table rather messy and congested.
If you are a normal person, expect sandwiches, scones and a selection of mini-cakes and chocolate treats. If you are afflicted by gluten sensitivity (as one of us was) you will receive gluten free sandwiches, a plate of chocolates accompanied by a mini vanilla mouse and some fresh fruit.
Now, our cream was not clotted (which is always preferred) but the sorbet like orange-flavoured pure in place of the lemon curd more than made up for the shortcoming. Marry this delicious condiment with their light and fluffy scones and you won’t want for much else. The sandwiches, though tasty, were rather unimaginative. And it didn’t escape our notice that the cucumbers that clung to the cucumber sandwich were looking rather limp and sad.
Our chocolate plate was fantastic, as you would expect from the chocolate gallery, but the mini-cakes were not. The sponge cake that looked like a cheese and spam sandwich (packed together with Grueyer-cheese shaped chocolate slices) was something we got quite a kick out of until we took a bite of the thing. A heinous disappointment. The mini-dome of rice pudding on an orange infused chocolate disc was kinder on the taste buds, though maybe because we expected so little from such an odd invention. ‘It works,’ was Anna McCormack’s pleasantly amused input, ‘But what kind of twisted mind do you have to have to come up with that?’
And finally the bill, which came up to Dhs200 for tea for two. This, in our humble opinion, makes sense.
High Tea at Le Café
You know you’re at the Emirates Palace when you have to wipe 24 carat gold leaf off the tip of your nose after taking a sip of your cappuccino. The afternoon tea at Abu Dhabi’s seven star hotel is as extravagant as everything else about the place. However, they seem to pay more attention to spoiling their guests than the actual tea itself. By this we mean that the tea menu was less extensive than that of the Chocolate Gallery, and that the Mokalbarie tea we ordered was not extravagant, full bodied spicy and malty (as the menu described) but tasted like your average Earl Grey. Adding to our chagrin was the way it was served. Our small pot arrived without a candle-burner to keep the thing from going cold, which is precisely what happened by the time our second course arrived.
Le Café’s redeeming feature, however, is everything that comes with the tea. Once you’ve been seated by the timid though courteous service-staff, you will be asked to make a choice between the traditional high tea and the more expensive Arabic high tea. We opted for the traditional because we are a bunch of paupers. Our first course was a selection of mini quiches. Then enter the scones and the glorious tiered plate of sandwiches, condiments and small cakes. The final course was the chocolate fondant – which we had to take home, because no normal human being can finish all of this food and live to tell the tale.
Once again, gluten-free alternatives were provided, and they were a lot more exciting than the Chocolate Gallery offerings. What really knocked our fancy-pants off though was biting into one of their fresh, gluten-free scones.
Unfortunately, Le Café lost points for serving all of this in courses, which was inconvenient for two reasons. Firstly, they wouldn’t bring our second course out until we’d wiped our plates clean of the first. Which meant that we were already 60% full by the time the best stuff arrived, and then asking for the bill before being informed that there was still chocolate fondant on its way. Secondly, our tea pots were either empty or luke-warm by the time the scones and sandwiches made an appearance, which robbed us of the opportunity to enjoy our goodies with our tea.
And what of the bill? A grand spanking Dhs600 for two. This, in our flabbergasted opinion, is shameless extortion though not entirely unexpected of the Emirates Palace, and probably worth spending for a special occasion.
Afternoon Tea at the Drawing Room
Last, but not least, we have the Drawing Room at St Regis, which has proved to be the cream of the crop for tea connoisseurs and posh ladies of leisure, alike. This classy hotel café combines excellent service with a splendid setting overlooking the sea, and a flawless afternoon tea experience. When the dapper, joyful staff showed us to our seats, our table had already been set for us. A detail that had us feeling rather precious from the start.
The menu listed 20 different kinds of tea excluding their three signature blends, which our confident and tea-savvy waiter was quick to recommend. We followed his advice and ordered the St Regis Arabian blend, as well as a Genmai Cha. The former, as Angel Beitz stated so aptly, was like ‘Christmas in a teacup.’ Rich with notes of orange, cinnamon, cloves and ginger, it was delightful and warming. The latter, apparently popular in Japan, was a popcorn infused almost savoury tea which was wholesome like noodle broth.
Both arrived within three minutes of their ideal brewing time and were placed on candle-burners with advice to let them sit for a moment. When the moment passed, our waiter returned to remove the filter (to prevent stewing) and poured it out with much ceremony.
This time our treats arrived in a timely fashion, not sporadically or in courses. Our tiered plate was tastefully piled with fresh sandwiches, scones, cakes and condiments (one point for the clotted cream – oh behave!). Though the offerings were fewer than at Le Café and the Chocolate Gallery, they were richer in variety, and better thought out. In fact, each mini cake looked like it had been painstakingly prepared with real heart, and had an individual taste and presence of its own. Flavours did not blend into one another, and were not the result of interchangeable components being thrown together. The mini brownie was bold and chocolatey, the muffin was dense and the lemon meringue tart was proud of its minute details. Add to this the option of getting re-fills of our tea, and we could find nothing to complain about.
Finally without further ado, the bill. This came up to Dhs300 for two, and in our opinion is not only mid-range but excellent value for money. We guarantee that you will leave feeling like you got everything you paid for and then some.
Afternoon tea at all venues is served from 2-6pm. Call in advance to request gluten-free alternatives. The Chocolate Gallery, Fairmont Bab al Bahr (02 654 3238). Le Cafe, Emirates Palace Hotel, Ras Al Akhdar (02 690 7999). The Drawing Room, St Regis, Saadiyat Island (02 498 8888).
