The best fish ’n’ chips: Captain’s Arms
From the gruff, unsmiling staff to the lightly greased, crispy batter that coats the fish, Captain’s Arms’ attempt at the classic workingman’s supper is probably the most authentic you’ll find in the capital. While others take the foolhardy measures of tarting up their renditions with quirky sauces and salad, this is simple, beige and tasty – just the way our tea-slurping chums like it. The small side dish of mushy peas is, admittedly, a sloppy abomination, but the crisp chunky chips are easily among the more faithfully British we’ve tasted in Abu Dhabi, and the cod – not hammour as used elsewhere – is flaky, flavoursome and fresh. The paper cone the dish is served up in is, admittedly, a tad patronising, but we can look beyond that.
Dhs59. Le Méridien (02 644 6666)
The best steak and kidney pie: Heroes
As with so many English delicacies, there’s no exact science to nailing this pastry-shrouded classic. It’s still remarkably easy to get wrong, though, hence why we’re tipping our shiny bowler hat in the direction of the folks at Heroes. As you’d expect from a venue attuned enough to their clientele to operate a dedicated pie menu, their Kate and Sidney packs in some tasty lumps of meat and a rich, salty gravy, while the golden pastry holds it all together with buttery flair. Our only gripe is that their steak and kidney pie comes served up with a clump of salad – a measure that’d earn the staff a stern dressing down were it to be repeated within the discerning confines of a merry old London pub.
Dhs58. Crowne Plaza Abu Dhabi (02 621 0000)
The best roast: Cooper’s Friday carvery
One of the most common complaints among desert-bound Westerners regards the lack of quality roasted meat and gravy available in the Middle East. Well, not only does this relatively new brunch serve up all of the aforementioned in gargantuan proportions, but we reckon it could even give your dear old mum’s rendition a run for its money. Turkey, chicken and beef (both rib-eye and sirloin roasts) are on offer, plus fresh, crispy-shelled, fluffy-centred Yorkshire puddings, roasted new potatoes, mash and green veg. The trimmings don’t stop there either – home-made gravy, horseradish and cranberry sauce are also available to heap on your plate as you see fit.
Dhs159 including free-flow beverages. Park Rotana (02 657 3333)
The best bangers and mash: 3rd Avenue
A fairly primal meal, when you think about it – comprising sausages, pulped potatoes, gravy and nothing more – but ask any Englishman to choose between this and a plate of the finest haute cuisine and you can fully expect to spend the day picking lumps of caviar and foie gras out of your hair. And as long as everything is done right – as it is in this tatty Khalidiyah pub – it’s hard to argue against it. The mash is velvety smooth, the sausages – though not made with the traditional meat – are thick and flavoursome, and the drizzle of red onion gravy holds it all together with rich, meaty notes and a tangy sweetness.
Dhs40. Sheraton Khalidiyah (02 666 6220)
The best chicken tikka masala: Ruchi
Given the excellent, authentic south Indian dishes on the menu at this hidden back-street gem, we can’t help but feel more than a little plebeian every time we pick up the phone to order our favourite British bastardisation. All pangs of philistinic guilt evaporate, however, as we peel back the cardboard lid and bask in the spicy, generic aroma wafting upwards from the silver container. The dish’s very nature means there’s no set way of doing things – the only requirements are chicken and sauce – but very few capitalise on this loose brief so triumphantly, with spicy, gingery sauce smothering tender chunks of spit-grilled meat. Perfection.
Dhs18. Hamdan Street, behind Al Mariah Mall (02 679 2679)
