Parents in Abu Dhabi know well the perils of getting too close to a ‘fun zone’. One false move and you can kiss goodbye to a wallet’s worth of dirhams.
So, in the interests of your financial welfare, we threw our five-year-old son in the back of the car and set ourselves a challenge: just how much fun can a child have for a meagre Dhs50, and what (innocent) mischief can a dad get up to on the side?
Fun Zone
Al Mariah Mall
Despite its futuristic glass-dome exterior, Al Mariah has seen better days. Reaching Fun Zone is not as easy as you’d hope. Labelling on the elevator buttons has long since perished, so finding the correct floor becomes a game in itself. Once inside, it’s dark and pulsating – not very child friendly – full of single men avoiding sunlight.
The challenge: It took us about 45 minutes to spend our Dhs50, spread over eight games. While this suggests reasonable value, many of the machines were broken, and there was a high proportion of shoot ’em ups (it’s demoralising to watch a five-year-old blow away a defenceless diplodocus with such glee). The bumper cars were set at neck-breaking speeds; our only opponent was a local pre-schooler, obviously in training for a life terrorising Salaam Street.
Dads’ delight: Not much for the dads here, other than the perennially popular basketball hoop and a boxing machine that may well have been lifted from a local gym.
Al Mariah Mall (02 671 5577). Open daily 10am-3am.
Wanasa Land
Al Wahda Mall
One unnerving thing that quickly became apparent during our challenge was the amount of single men who’ll happily drift over to a group of children to watch them play, some of them brandishing cameras. It’s likely that they’re harmless, but parents aren’t keen to take risks, so Wanasa Land gets extra points for their strict ‘families only’ policy.
The challenge: Dhs50 bought us seven games in 30 minutes – not the most generous, but the choices were many, varied, and often fairly spectacular. ‘I think I just achieved zero gravity,’ yelled one girl; good going for someone riding a rocking boat. The magic bikes ride certainly helped to burn off some energy, but our favourite was the Japanese percussion game – imagine what the Beatles might have achieved had Ringo been given one of these as a child.
Dads’ delight: Wanasa Land proudly boasts Strike Zone, a kind of laser quest, which allows dads to relinquish all sense of responsibility and chase their offspring with a gun. However, if you’re after something less likely to cause future resentment, there’s a bowling centre just next door.
Al Wahda Mall (02 443 7654). Open 10am-12 midnight.
Sparky’s
Khalidiyah Mall
Vast and well presented, Sparky’s takes up a large part of Khalidiyah Mall’s top floor. The design theme linking the rides suggests that the owners see this more as a mini-theme park than another kids’ centre, and it’s true that – if you’re splashing out – your young ’uns could probably spend hours here (though you may suffer a neon-induced headache). The biggest attraction is a small ice rink (for kids aged six-12 only), which will happily eat Dhs35, and a 4D cinema adds to the sense of occasion. There’s also a large and well-padded playhouse (ball pools, slides etc) for toddlers and smaller kids.
The challenge: We got seven games in before our money was up; 30 minutes happily spent on a decent variety of activities that ran for longer than most. Super Air Hockey proved very popular, as did the gut-rupturing ride Coconut Drop (best to save your visit to the food court for later).
Dads’ delight: Sparky’s has got it going on! The bowling alley is relatively cheap, at Dhs15 per person per game, and Striker Pro (on which you test your free kick skills against a digital goalkeeper) will make a Beckham of anyone.
Khalidiyah Mall (02 635 4000). Open Sat-Thu 10am-12 midnight; Fri 1pm-12 midnight.
Fun City
Marina Mall
About the same size as a small planet, Fun City operates an invisible tractor beam that beckons to small children across Marina Mall’s food court, feeding the urge to tug on Daddy’s sleeve and whine, ‘If you loved me, you’d let me go.’ It is a vast and sprawling empire, rich with arcade games, emboldened by a shark rollercoaster that thrashes and whips with no notion of mercy.
The challenge: There’s plenty for all age groups here. We managed seven activities in 30 minutes for our Dhs50, including the rollercoaster (keep tight hold of the little ones – one corner in particular might knock some sense into them) and the bumper cars. The City is heavy on arcade games, including several simple machines for the under-fives.
Dads’ delight: We were quite taken with the Extreme Shock machine which is actually, you’ll be pleased to know, a fancy version of air hockey rather than the psychiatric treatment the name hints at.
Marina Mall (02 681 5526). Open Sun-wed 10am-11pm; Thu 10am-12 midnight; Fri 2pm-12 midnight.
Kidoos
Abu Dhabi Mall
Considering the size and stature of Abu Dhabi Mall, it’s strange that the kids’ zone is so small and unloved. Swept out of the way in a tight corner of the third floor, the area also includes a ballpark that can be hired for private parties.
The challenge: Nine games in about 45 minutes are not to be sniffed at, let us assure you. However, most of the arcades are dilapidated and several generations out of date. The highlight for most (and dads will curse their grown-up luck here) is the 10m climbing wall, which doubles as a kind of abseiling event.
Dads’ delight: Our advice? Come with another dad and set yourself up for an afternoon of table football. Alternatively, a machine called Blazing Angels allows you to take control of a Spitfire and defend London during the Battle of Britain. Let your kid watch and you could even pass it off as an impromptu history lesson…
Abu Dhabi Mall (02 645 9070). Open Sun-Wed 10am-10pm; Thu 10am-11pm; Fri 3pm-11pm.
