For four-and-a-bit years now I’ve lived in our fair capital and while you’ll always learn a whole heap of stuff from any new place, Abu Dhabi has had some very specific lesson for me.
Not only have I learned about the transient nature of any expat community, I’ve found that if you make it through those first 12 months, you’re either here for three, five or life. I’m talking years, of course. And you can always spot the lifers: they’re the ones who can recommend you their favourite shisha spot from a list of 500, who know more about the history of the UAE than their own country, and who know the names and numbers of any given street.
I’ve learned that, though I always thought I was quite a feminine female, my gender can sometimes be in doubt. This would be on occasions where I receive an email addressed to Mr Anna, despite having spoken to the sender on the phone only moments before. Or when a sales assistant feels they have to cover all their bases when I walk towards them, alone: ‘Hello Maamsir.’ Just the ma’am part please; or better yet, just Anna. It’s a nice name, I think.
I’ve learned how to quickly identify if a person is going to be able to give me the information I want, or if I should just try to connect to a higher power. Like the time I wanted to find out exactly what was in cream sauce that came with some mussels – for the sake of allergies and such. I asked the waiter, who told me it was cream; hoping to find some onions, or garlic, or nuts or something else, I pressed him: ‘Cream, you know, it’s like milk, but different.’
I’ve learned that where I thought things were different, they can actually be the same – such as when my husband couldn’t find black shoelaces at the supermarket. When he asked someone where they were, he was presented with a pair of brown shoe laces. Upon unequivocally proving that they were in fact brown and not black he was told: ‘Same-same’.
I’ve learned that when I’m in a taxi and say: ‘Don’t go to Salam Street please, there’s too much traffic,’ it actually means: ‘You crack on and let us sit for an extra ten minutes at all of those traffic lights, completely unnecessarily, when there is a perfectly fine, alternative, faster route that I did actually suggest.’
But then, I’ve also learned that people can have infinite generosity in Abu Dhabi, that people will rush to your aid if you appear even in the slightest bit of distress, and that in some parts of the world chivalry isn’t actually dead. Perhaps most importantly, I’ve learned that you can easily let the little things frustrate you to the point of madness, or you can choose to just chill out, go with the flow and laugh about it all instead – and I’ve learned to laugh. Maniacally.
